I was so angry at my past for forming me into a woman who thought she had to solve everyone else's problems - make everyone else happy - do all the things expected of me.Read More
Being stressed out because of other people sucks. And it turns out it’s entirely avoidable.
But here’s the thing about belief systems…you likely didn’t choose them (unless as an adult you intentionally changed them,) so you’re unaware of them and the effect they have on you. But that effect is monumental.Read More
I’ve fallen in this trap more times than I could even tell you. It once was as normal as breathing.
Someone presents you with a need, a request, an expectation, a demand - anything they desire you to do.
And it sounds like such a noble idea. And you really like being needed. And doing something helpful makes you feel included. And loved. And appreciated.
Especially when they tell you things like, “I’m just so overwhelmed. I need you desperately.”Read More
It is possible to be considerate and say “no” to someone else.
It is also possible to be well-mannered and politely decline their offer, request, or even their demand.
It’s not people’s expectations that are the problem. It’s our addiction to having their approval that’s the real issue.Read More
If you’re thinking the thought, “I don’t have enough time,” then you’re actually creating the result of “not enough time” in your life.Read More
Avoiding and resisting my feelings is a habit for me. I’m so well-practiced in putting on a facade (even for myself) and acting like everything is wonderful. “I don’t have time to deal with that” I’ve told myself.
It’s precisely this behavior that landed me in a therapist’s office several years ago.Read More
We only want our goals because of how we think we’ll feel once we have them. What we truly want is the feeling. And we can create that ahead of time.Read More
If you’re in pain and you’re blaming “love” for it, you’re mistaken. That feeling isn’t love. It could be disappointment, shame, guilt or any host of other emotions, but it definitely isn’t love.Read More
Right now you’re angry. Angry at God, angry at everyone around you, angry at everything. You blame everybody around you. God, your husband, your life, even yourself for making the choices you did. But that’s normal. That’s a part of the process.Read More
By design, feelings lead us. 🚙
So when people say, “don’t be led by your emotions” it’s well-intended, but feelings are entirely misunderstood. They’ve had a bad rap.Read More
No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. - Hebrews 12:11
We want the results of growth but so often fight the uncomfortable process, and therefore sabotage our dreams.Read More
Inauthenticity can be linked to so many flavors of unnecessary emotional suffering. For me, living a lie cost me my emotional stability. I couldn’t imagine myself living happily with my own choices, outside of the approval of others. I didn’t trust my judgment, my own decisions. But now, things couldn’t be more different.Read More
Blaming others for my own discomfort places me in the role of a victim - I’m helpless and in pain and it’s someone else’s fault.Read More
After 4 years of being unhappily married, I finally discovered how to fall in love with my amazing husband.Read More
Sometimes for a marriage to improve, all it takes is ONE person making an investment into their mental and emotional health; to consistently dedicate time to change the way they approach their relationship.Read More
We often think forgiveness will let the other person off the hook. That somehow we’re punishing them with our unforgiveness and judgmental attitude. Turns out, we’re only punishing ourselves.Read More
Do you feel the irresistible pull to solve everyone else’s problems? I once did, and it nearly destroyed me. Co-dependency is a great way to live a crummy life.Read More
"I’m not good enough! Everyone else is so much better than me! Why should I bother learning this? Everyone else is already doing it. I’ve fallen 3 times, flat on my face. I’m never going to get this. This just isn’t my thing. I’m not supposed to do this in my life."Read More
Deciding to love unconditionally is one of the best gifts you can give yourself. And of course for others, but you’re the one who lives with you.Read More
Depression overwhelmed me for years. I thought my marriage was to blame. I didn’t think there was any solution other than divorce. It turns out a beautiful marriage was completely within my reach the whole time. ❤️Read More